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How to Get Her Trust Back - 3 Rules That Should Never Be Broken
By Dr. George Karanastasis | September 8, 2009
Losing a girl’s trust will often lead to a breakup. And the only way to patch things up is to gain that trust back.
Unfortunately, it’s not an easy task. Nevertheless, it’s a necessary step to repairing a relationship.
With that said, this post will point out 3 rules that should never be broken if you hope to succeed…
Rule #1: Trust must be earned. You can’t pressure or persuade a girl to trust you again. She has to make that decision on her own. And for this to occur, one thing has to come first: change.
You have to change that which caused her to stop trusting you. This takes time. However, you can move things along a tad bit quicker. Here’s how…
Write down everything you plan to do on paper and give it to her. Why paper? Because of these two reasons:
1. Promises are made, forgotten, and broken all the time. She knows this. But this makes you accountable to her. And accountability is the first step towards regaining her trust.
2. You can’t persuade her to trust you but your written plan can. If you were to tell her, repeatedly, that you changed, she’d get turned off and wouldn’t give you a second chance. However, you written plan can do this time and time again without turning her off.
Rule #2: Trust can never be “tricked”. Do not make drastic changes fast. If you go from being the worst guy in the world to the best (from one day to the next) she’ll see through the ploy. She knows that the moment she eases up on you, you’ll revert to your old ways. Make slow and steady changes she can believe you’ll stick to.
Rule #3: Trust must never be broken - twice. You’ve been given a second chance because of a promise - a promise she believes you’ll keep. Don’t make the same mistake again. Whatever it is you plan to do - get it done. Second chances are hard to come by - third are non-existent.
By sticking to these rules you’ll be in a good position to get her trust back. But don’t forget them once you have it. Remember, it’s hard to re-gain but easy to lose again.
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November 30th, 2009 at 3:27 am
George, I was with my girl for over a year, and things went perfectly until about the month surrounding our anniversary. Not long after it, she dumped me and said she wasn’t happy anymore, and that she was still attracted to me, but not as much as before. I begged and pleaded, and it took almost a month to collect myself, but I’ve had minimal contact with her and now she’s getting involved with another guy that I honestly can’t compete with. We’ve made up, I’ve accepted that leaving me was the right thing for her to do, and she knows that. When we talk the conversation is very cold now, and she won’t be able to talk at all for the next 2 weeks to anyone. A few days after that ends, we’ll see each other for the 3rd time since the breakup. The first 2 times went okay, but I was at a loss for what to do to get her back. We were both friendly and everything, but I was at a loss. Do you have any advice for me? Do you think this 2 weeks will help or hurt my chances?